HOPE

I titled this blog hope because this morning in my Bible reading, I read Lamentations 3. Today, I am filing for a divorce. I don't think I have struggled more with a single decision more in life, ever. There are so many mixed emotions. The strongest one being grief and mourning over the death of my marriage of almost 18 years.

In my Life Recovery bible the commentary says: Lamentations 3:1-26.

Perhaps we are brokenhearted because of all the bitter suffering in our family. Maybe our once-good reputation has been ruined and now we are ashamed. Our life has been taken captive and destroyed before the watchful eyes of friends and foes alike.

Jeremiah watched this happen to his beloved nation, Israel. It's no wonder he is known as the weeping prophet. The people of God refused to listen to Jeremiah's warnings, and they were taken captive by a heathen nation as a result. Lamentations is a record of Jeremiah's lament over the shameful fate of God's people. He wept, " Peace has been stripped away, and I have forgotten what prosperity is. I cry out, ' My splendor is gone! Everything I had hoped for from the Lord is lost!' The thought of my suffering and homelessness is bitter beyond words. I will never forget this awful time, as I grieve over my loss. Yet I still dare to HOPE when I remember this:

The unfailing love of the Lord never ends!! By his mercies we have been kept from complete destruction. Great is his faithfulness, his mercies begin afresh each day. I say to myself, ' The Lord is my inheritance, therefore, I will hope in him!'
So it is good to wait quietly for salvation from the Lord.

Turning our life over to God includes giving him our pain and suffering. In our times of grief and shame we can hope, knowing that God will help us overcome the problems we face. God is strong enough to lift our burdens and loving enough to mend our broken hearts.

So, as you can see, God knew exactly what I needed to hear today. He is soooooo good!! I love the fact that HIS love never ends for us. His mercy will give us hope for each day!

Kept by His Mercy today,

Dee Ann

A glorious day!!

When we think we have had enough of it all, God allows the clouds and storms to roll back and He gives us a glimpse of His majesty and glory!

Yesterday was the Medlock Juvenile Prison Ministry event. It was a glorious day!! The weather was perfect, God provided some awesome teaching and testimonies, beautiful music and more than enough hot dogs and cookies. There was 42 new decisions for Christ. God is moving in such a powerful way in the hearts of the youth and staff there at Medlock. It is an awesome privilege to get to be a small part of what God is doing there.

I was so blessed to get to work side by side with my Brothers and Sisters in Christ there. I was once again so encouraged by God's people. When we walk through the dark storms of life, he sends his people to show us his goodness and He does it just for us in a very personal way!! But, the really cool thing about our God is that he is the master at multitasking. He blessed the youth and staff at Medlock, the other volunteers and me all at the same time!

God thank you for giving us glimpses of your glory. It helps so much when we are walking through the storms of life to get to see you alive and working. It gives me the encouragement and strength to keep walking. God, help us to be your people that can bless others while we walk with you. Jesus Name, Amen.

I will praise you in the storm

Life has changed a lot in the short time since I have posted. My husband and I of 18 years has decided to once again separate. We were separated for a year and a half and then reconciled for 7 months. The reconciliation didn't make it, I'm sorry to say. There is a time to mourn and a time to laugh the Bible says and now isn't a laughing time for me. As a matter of fact, the death of anything or anybody dear to us leaves us asking the big question, WHY?

I am so thankful that God just holds us close to his heart and lets us beat against his chest as we ask it. I am feeling a little like a female Job right now. My husband is gone, my son is in prison and my daughter doesn't want to live here when my son returns home. I know it can be worse, but somehow that doesn't take the pain away.

Not to mention the bills piling up as the checkbook dwindles. But, that is the least of my concerns.

I told you that some field trips aren't easy and this is one of them. I am going to praise God for my many many blessings and most of all for his presence in my life. I look for the blessings each step. I have found many!!

My daughter's heart is softening some. The hurt and bitterness will be melted like snow as spring approaches. This is just a season. We are all in good health. My mother's blood clot is dissolving. My friends in Christ are holding my arms up in the battle and lacing my boots once again. I still have a home and a job. Dastena is growing in her faith in spite of the problems. She sees us depending on God to get us to the next field trip. My son is reading his Bible and learning to play guitar in prison for the worship services there. God is blessing the Medlock Juvenile Prison Ministry and it is awesome to be a part of that. I have so MUCH to praise for him in this storm because the rainbow is a promise.

God is faithful!!

Looking at the rainbow through the clouds,

Dee Ann

Old Tennis Shoes

I have started a Bible study called " Walking by Faith, Lessons learned in the dark" written by a blind lady Jennifer Rothschild. It caught my attention because of the fieldtrips that God calls us to. I have never done one of her studies before but I can tell already that God is going to use this study in his word to impact my walk of faith in ways that I can't even imagine, so I am excited about that!

One of the lessons in the book that I was reading was about fear. The timing was ALL God! I have been experiencing some of that!

My mother was just diagnosed with a large clot in the main artery of her thigh. She has been undergoing shots and medicines to thin her blood. My mother is my BEST friend in life. I can tell her anything and everything and her unconditional love is something that has given me the strength to continue to walk many times. That is just ONE of the things that I was experiencing fear about.

This is what Jennifer writes. " Fear is a feeling, trust is a choice." My choice to trust God will envitably change my feelings of fear. She says, " When we say that we trust God yet never risk acting on His Word, we really don't trust Him at all. Trust shows itself when it leaves the tip of our tongues and lands on our tennis shoes and we begin to walk-not just talk-our faith."

I am learning that God wants us to have tennis shoes available as well as the hiking boots! There are times that we will have to run with perserverance.

"Let Us Run With Perseverance The Race That Is Set Before Us..." (Hebrews 11 and 12:1,2)

So how do we do this?

We shall keep on running regardless of distractions. We must run singlemindedly; run with a focus, a concentration, a determination that is aware only of the matter at hand. We must run with an intensity that unfailingly announces our steadfastness.

To run with perseverance means we shall keep on running patiently. The race of the Christian fieldtrip isn't a sprint that ends in 9.35 seconds. It's a long race, a lifelong race. We must run patiently.

Be sure to run so as to finish. It is only as we finish -- who cares if we get to our goal with scraped knees and bleeding face? -- it is only as we finish that we find ourselves admitted to the great cloud of witnesses in the company of our elder brother, Jesus. And it is only as we finish that God himself is glorified.

So Brothers and Sisters in Christ keep your tennis shoes ready too because we obviously need those as well as hiking boots, it depends on the terrain and know that there are others cheering you on as you trust God to get you where he wants you!

Dee Ann

Skate Church

Last night Rodney, London, Dastena and I went to skate church. I know your probably thinking what is skate church? Well, it is a ministry that our church has for mainly unchurched kids that skate and some that don't. It is an awesome evangelistic outreach. This will be my 3rd year to be involved at skate church. As you know, I am pretty busy these days with 3 teenagers , working full time, juvenile prison ministry and a ladies growth group! So, I have been thinking... not praying much but thinking... God I need a break! I had rehearsed my excuse several times in my head on the drive.

At the right time, I told the skate church's pastor's wife, that I was thinking about taking a little time off. She totally understood and was very gracious. Well, about 10 minutes after telling her this, I go outside to mingle with the kids. I start talking to a teen girl that one of the other leaders had mentioned that he thought she could really use a woman leader to talk to her. So, I start making small talk with her. While I am talking to her, another young man comes up and starts talking to us. Now this is where it really gets wild. It is a kid that use to be at Medlock. The Juvenile Prison that we go to minister at. SO... one thing leads to another and I start telling them my testimony. They both have very similar stories in that they have used drugs and are struggling just to survive. I shared with both of them how God has changed my life and given me a purpose and how he has a purpose for their lives as well. By this time, the young lady is starting to cry so I ask if she wants to go talk somewhere quieter. She says yes.

We talked for a long time and then I ask her, " where are you in your walk with Christ?" She answered, " Nowhere and I don't want to be." I was kinda taken aback and then asked "Why?" Her answer was that her Mother and Father ( who are divorced) claims to be Christian and if that is the way Christians are that she didn't want to be one. She proceeded to tell me through tears that her mother is a drunkard and sleeps with her boyfriend on Saturday night and then goes to church on Sunday. Her father is the same. My heart broke into pieces. I asked if I could pray for her and her family. She said ok. Her heart is so hurt and hardened. I felt so sorry for her. She truly didn't want to have anything to do with Christ. But, why was she at church? God is pursuing her and I told her that she can be a follower of Christ and not JUST a believer. I am praying that she will come to faith and will make a difference in her family.

On the drive home, I pondered everything. I went to resign and instead I connected with two kids that are hurting. God impressed on me the importance of our walk with him. These kids are screaming out " SHOW US this God stuff works in life." It made me really really evaluate my walk and the impact it has on others. God forgive me for when I haven't walked close with you and led others away from you instead of to you. God help me to walk so close that the sand is still warm from your footprints. Not running ahead or falling behind. Help us in this faith walk Lord!! Amen.

WALK by faith

I have been getting ready to go minister to a juvenile prison this morning. I love getting up early with the Lord and reading his word. It is so alive and active. Our lesson for Medlock is the Cost of Following Christ. We are going to show a dvd of a young man named Afshin Ziafat. He came to Lake Pointe church and gave his testimony. He was raised Muslim with a very prominent Muslim father who is a doctor in Houston. He story is how he came to be a follower of Christ. It is very exciting to see God reach down and touch people's lives and say " Come follow me." If we counted all the times in the new testament that Jesus said those words, it would astound us. I think he wants us to follow him!! Hm... must be why he wants us to have on hiking boots.



Well I am back from the visit at Medlock and it was totally amazing! God is so alive and active! There was 30 decisions for Christ! The ministry is growing and sometimes it can be quite overwhelming. I can't wait to see where this fieldtrip leads. God is raising up more workers for his ministry too. The support and volunteers are gifts from God himself not only to the kids and staff at Medlock but to me too. They have richly blessed many many lives.

Thankful,
Dee Ann

I am willing Lord.

Well, I am going on this field trip kicking and screaming! God helped me through the temper tantrum of wanting to stay in my comfort zone and feeling like life is unfair. How can we possibly let another teenager live with us!

I feel much better now though. He let me throw it and say NO... then he gently led me to McDonalds to listen to Dastena's legal guardian. She said "that Dastena doesn't want to be Muslim and that if we are willing to take Dastena in our home, she give Christian family to Dastena. "How can you say no! That in itself is a miracle. She is living in an oppressive situation and out of love for Dastena, she is giving her her freedom. It is a breakaway for her. I will be in close contact with her Aunt. God give me your love and light to shine in her life as well. This is going to be an interesting field trip, I do believe. Dastena is excited about getting to come. I was able to get power of attorney and we will do our best, with God 's help ,to show Dastena the love of Christ. She will be able to finish high school with London. She is behind because they have moved so much. Please pray she will be able to get caught up and able to graduate on time. Please pray for her and London not to get on each other's nerves too much. ( and ours )

Thank you God for giving us this opportunity and let London see that we are a family that will walk the walk and not just talk the talk.

Here is a picture of Dastena. Please pray for her family too! Thanks!